Wednesday, August 23, 2006

Slutty non sequiturs are the best non sequiturs.

Girl #1: So you don't even really like him? Why did you even hook up with him?
Girl #2: Why did Sir Edmund Hillary climb Mount Everest?
Girl #1: Huh? Why?
Girl #2: Because it was there.

-- overheard by Erica

21 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

A violent death upon all UGG-wearers!

-Bob, the UGG Conquerer

1:44 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I was about to tell Bob, the UGG Conquerer that wishing death on people just because of something they were is derogatory and indicative of prejudice until I realized that people who wear UGG's really do suck and deserve to be hurled into the sun.

2:33 PM  
Blogger Damian said...

That's a smart loose woman!

5:15 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

2:33 - Do UGG-wearers REALLY deserve to be hurled into the sun? In my opinion that is a tad bit of an extreme punishment for people whose (possible) only crime is poor choice in footwear. I therefore suggest we merely amputate their legs so they can no longer offend my eyes with their hideous waffle-stompers. Other felicitous punishments will be dealt for similar crimes such the wearing of bug-eye sunglasses, for which I suggest the punishment be removal of the offender's eyes so such repugnant spectacles will be of no more use.

5:18 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

5:18- But then won't they wear even BIGGER bug-eyed sunglasses to cover the gaping wound where their eyes were extracted?

6:59 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

If they did that, THEN they would deserve to be hurled into the sun.

8:06 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

nah...they wouldn't start wearing bigger sunglasses...eyepatches would just become trendy....

12:52 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Ahoy, Matey! Har har har.

5:07 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

5:18,
I must disagree with your proposed solution to the bug-eye sunglasses. The removal of the wearer's eyes will not solve the problem, in fact it will most likely exacerbate it, as they will now have a valid reason to wear them; to cover their empty eye-sockets.
Clearly the only valid solution is to gouge out the eyes of all people who dislike them, and thus stop their suffering.

5:56 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

...OR we can just hurl them into the sun.

9:51 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

...or we could all just try to forget our troubles with a BIG BOWL of strawberry ice cream!

1:11 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

we could cut off their ears so there glasses have nothing to sit on..

8:58 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

The cutting off of the ears is actually a good idea.... AND it would also get rid of the oversized Chanel earrings.... dumb barbies.... however, kudos to the girl from the original post... let's be honest, many men (myself included) have had one night stands for that very reason... so I'm no place to judge. Down with the double standards!

10:27 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

i'm just glad that all the students are starting to filter back into Forest City lifestyle. Maybe the posts at overheard will become more frequent. And maybe, just maybe, gurls will have smartened up on their choices of footwear, I haven't seen any uggs so far, and we won't have to hear from Dob the Bug Conquerer anymore.

12:29 PM  
Anonymous CL said...

There are 2 excuses for a woman to wear bug eye glasses: 1. her boyfriend/husband beats her, or 2. she doesn't want the other soccer moms to know she's hung over.

9:33 PM  
Blogger Vidar said...

And maybe, just maybe, gurls will have smartened up on their choices of footwear, I haven't seen any uggs so far

Luckily, no, but the overall quality of dress that I've seen so far in the couple of days that the tots have been back is certainly not improved. The retarded sunglasses are only the most obvious thing.

we could cut off their ears so there glasses have nothing to sit on..

That doesn't solve the larger problem though. These people need to be sterilized so that their inferior genetics can be removed from society...

5:19 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Sterilization is illegal, but we should eventually be able to screen embryos for such genes and remove them from the population. Eugenics is the way of the future.

11:38 PM  
Blogger Vidar said...

Sterilization is illegal

OK, so euthanasia for all oversized-sunglass skanks it is.

10:09 AM  
Blogger iveyguy said...

What the hell does "UGG" mean?

9:40 PM  
Blogger Vidar said...

I think it's some sort of Australian acronym for "mentally disadvantaged skanky whore"...

11:33 AM  
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4:45 AM  

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