Sunday, April 09, 2006

But it's so little and harmless!

Girl: It's not that I'm AFRAID of it. I just don't like it being thrust in my face!

-- Wendy's, overheard by Bryan

61 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

I wonder if she's talking about the Spicy Chicken Sandwich, or maybe something else....

3:40 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

The destruction of the Ugg race will usher in an era of long-term macroeconomic stability.

-Bob, the UGG Conquerer

5:16 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Fuck off attention whore.

6:23 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Bob the Ugg Conquerer for Prime Minister!

6:36 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

So, Bob, if you truly are the Ugg Conquerer, you can thrill us with your tales of conquest. What have you actually done to destroy these Uggs, beyong annoying message board posts?

8:38 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

beyond

8:38 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Bob should create a team of people who go around stealing uggs.

9:49 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

bob is a douchebag.

11:16 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Bob: Fuck off attention whore.

11:17 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

8:38 - Just last Friday, I led an army of six-score men against the vile Ugg stronghold at the Social Science building.

We laid siege to the wretched hive of scum and villainy. We attempted to smoke the Ugg-wearers out by torching several sociology dissertations and launching them onto the third floor, but our cunning foes were able to quickly stamp out the flames with the soles of their disgustingly oversized boots. Playing dirty, the Ugg wearers unleashed biological weapons onto my forces, spraying them with a lethal and noxious substance (believed to be the typical perfume worn by Western skanks). Have you ever heard the death cries of a man being suffocated by the putridly unnatural floral stench of some shitty generic brand fragrence? It's a sound that sticks with you until the day you die.

I sent in an elite commando team to infiltrate the Ugg-wearers. Becoming concerned after they failed to return, I recieved a horrifying report that they had been found dead of severe sexually transmitted diseases, many of which were previously unknown to mankind. Repulsed, we stormed the building in the name of our fallen comrades. After a fierce battle and the deaths of many good men, we made it to the third floor and proceeded to slaughter the Ugg infidels like the animals they truly are! Before leaving, I collected a pair of Uggs as a trophy of our conquering triumph.

However, I know my work is not yet done. Where one Ugg Wearer is slain, there are always two more to take its place. I must continue my tireless quest to rid humanity of this plague, and ensure the future is safe for our children, and our children's children.

-Bob, the UGG Conquerer

11:22 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

^ i'm not even going to read the above.

fuck off attention whore.

11:35 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Bob,

OK, we get it, you're a lonely, probably suburban-oppressed kid who probably likes to listen to emo rock and thinks he's been so hurt by the world because you're a douchebag who can't get none, that's why you hate on the Western skanks. Fine, skanks they are, but they ain't skanking it up with you. Stop using the internet as an emotional outlet for your delusional imagination because you can't get along with people in the real world.

And I probably spent way too much time on this post, making me sound like a douchebag, but you just pissed the absolute fuck out of me.

11:40 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

11:40 - nice.

11:42 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Fuck you Bob. Choke on your retarded Ugg-fixation already and remove yourself from the gene pool. The sooner the better...

11:59 PM  
Anonymous Josh said...

You know, I check the site occaisonally, because I like reading the comments that you all post. Bob, I have to say, that you've got too much free time to post all of this stuff. The weather is getting better outside, so go and have some non RAM fun ok? Try not to let a pair of boots, a website, and entertaining a bunch of anonymous people rule your life. You are in university, surely you have better things and people to do?

Keep up the saying stupid things all of you! (and Bob too!)

lovin it,

-Josh

12:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

i'll admit bob's posts are getting kind of annoying, but 11:22 was fucking hilarious!

12:03 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Has anyone considered this is the time of year for writing essays? I have it on good authority that Bob is neither an emo-kid nor does he "hate Western skanks because he isn't getting any", but is rather procrastinating from writing a 3000-word essay that's due tommorow, instead opting to waste time pissing people off on Overheard at Western.

-Most definately NOT Bob the Ugg Conquerer

12:09 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'm sorry, but Bob's 11:22 post is one of *the* funniest comments I read on this site. Hands down.

9:29 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

see, if Bob posted less often, but with better material (see 11:22) I think he'd be a lot more popular around here...

10:10 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

less Bob
More cowbell

2:45 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

12:09--it's spelt definitely. As in finite, as in not infinite. Why the fuck do people have such a big problem with this?!

At least Bob uses correct spelling, the attention whore that he is.

- Stickler for spelling

3:34 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

3:34, you live at your mom's house don't you

4:05 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

3:34, ar u honestly spell and grammer cheking every post? This is a BLOG, not a english essay. and know what the crazy part is? despite all this atroshious speling and grammer, you can still understand what the meaningn is. comunication was still sucessful, imagine that.

5:33 PM  
Anonymous i got a fever, and the only prescription is more cowbell said...

2:45 - marry me. you're the cock of the walk, baby.

5:39 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

okay, 11:22 was hilarious, 12:09 is probably right, and 3:34, I love good spelling, but it's not exactly the end of the world if someone doesn't spell a word right. I think people like to procrastinate with these blogs and would rather not have to have an essay state-of-mind when they're on here.


If you're still convinced good spelling is a super important thing, read the following forward:


Olny srmat poelpe can raed tihs. I

cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg.
The
phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid, aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at
Cmabrigde Uinervtisy,

it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny
iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae.
The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a
porbelm.

Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef,
but the wrod as a wlohe. Amzanig huh? yaeh and I awlyas tghuhot
slpeling was ipmorantt!

6:11 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

For all of you who found Bob's 11:22 comment to be amusing, you are all a bunch of morons. As for you, Bob, where do you get off thinking it is funny to joke about violently attacking and killing women? You used to be a lame attention whore. Now you have shown yourself to be a sexist prick who gets off on violence against women. You need to shut the hell up.

7:27 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

yeah, we have enough war and violence in the world, we don't need bob to create bullshit fables about slaughtering anyone.

8:09 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

hmmm...nobody noticed that 3:34 used the word 'spelt'? last time i checked it was 'spelled' not 'spelt'...pretty ironic

9:51 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

wow bob, you sure do suck.

11:28 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

violence against women? sexist? lol you feminists really believe that's what bob is? that's funny.

(I'm a girl.)

2:15 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Keep on writing, Bob... I love reading your comments on the uggs... it's a very nice addition to my procrastination routine...

2:56 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

7:27 - are you fucking serious?

What sort of braindead, mentally retarded douche actually brings feminism to the table as a criticism?

Saying Bob isn't funny or an attention whore is one thing, but taking an obvious joke as "promoting violence against women" has to be the stupidest thing I've read all week.

Besides, re-read Bob's post. He never specifically advocates killing women... just anyone who wears uggs.

6:44 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

7:27 = typical liberal voter... Why do femenists have to ruin everything that is fun? Why? Is joking around and having fun only a male thing?

9:32 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

9:32: Years of research and federal grant money point to yes.

10:56 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Sounds like a face fucking....

11:26 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Firstly, 9:51, both "spelled" and "spelt" are accepted spellings of the same word. (http://www.askoxford.com/concise_oed/spelt?view=uk)

Secondly, I do not "spell-check" every single comment and post. I just happen to be educated enough to notice spelling errors as I'm reading, and after a while simple ones start to bother me.

Thirdly, it's not "the end of the world." Did my post contain a reference to the Judgement Day? People with poor spelling are freakin' annoying, that's all.

All of you who think I'm a dick for pointing it out will wish you learned proper English when a few simple errors ruin your essays or cover letters.

Have a nice day,

- Stickler

1:38 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

hey stickler, why don't you go back to your mom's house and play computer games by yourself

2:09 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

^ ...zing!

2:05 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Isn't it obvious to you all?
Bob, and all his annoyingness, is probably just some 14 year old kid who happened to stumble across this site while checking out the porn on his brothers computer. Ignore it and it will go away.

5:57 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I never thought the Bob persona and a few random comments from time to time would piss off so many people. It's great... if anything, the real loser isn't Bob, it's the idiots who've become visibly enraged and obsessed with getting rid of him. For shit's sake, people... this is a fucking internet comments thread, and many of you are acting like Bob stole your girlfriend or raped your cat or something.

Get over yourselves.

7:12 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Bob did rape my cat!! That bastard!!

4:38 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

They KILLED KENNY! THOSE BASTARDS!!

6:15 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

^ I love South Park. I can't wait to download tonight's episode! (It's parodying that Danish cartoon incident).

7:10 PM  
Anonymous Josh said...

You are all missing the point

Go outside. It's nice. Plus really, hiding behind the anonymity of the net is cowardly. You couldn't say half the things you all get away with here in the real world. This is a website that takes quotes out of context and puts them up here for a brief laugh. Laugh, and then close the browser. There's more to life than arguing with people you don't even know!

Get some new hobbies (that includes you bob). Smoke, drink, have sex, write something, just anything other than post the crap that's taken over this website!

Let's not resort to stupid comments, dumb jokes, grammar nazi's and other crap - ideally we're in university! Now go study, get degrees and contribute meaningfully to society. Otherwise, volunteer to be speed bumps and do something useful! Better to use you then the little oil we'd waste actually making the bump.

- Josh.

ps - Bob you really want attention? Then post your email or website, or have a fucking conversation with a real person, someone who actually cares about you!

9:02 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

i don't even care about bob anymore, the spelling stickler or "grammar nazi" is the real douchebag.

10:11 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Ha ha ha, Josh you just made my day...you are telling everyone else to get a life and stop posting stupid comments...yet you managed to find the time to whip up a pretty lengthy post there, my friend...enough said

11:14 PM  
Anonymous jane doe said...

it's also real big of josh to use his real(?) name wihtout any surname or any other means of identifying himself...because i'm sure there's only ONE josh at western.

josh hypocrite (i'm assuming that's your middle name) anonymous: we salute you!

1:22 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Another vote for "Josh" being a hypocrite. This site is endless for the laughs... someone tells us all to go outside and get some hobbies... by writing a ridiculously long post.

9:58 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

hahaha... "jane doe" ... that's awesome

12:40 PM  
Anonymous Josh said...

You thought that was a long post? Have you ever read anything longer than a page?

And yes, I have to tell you people on here to go outside, after all you can't speak to a Jew in German can you? (meaning: I can't tell you to go out side in any other way) I intended as you misunderstood: spend time on here, it's fun! Just not TOO much time.

I think I'm the only one to have the guts to use a name on here... Which happends to be my first, and I wouldn't give any of you the oportunity to find out my last.

short enough?

- Josh

5:30 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Ich bin ein Jude und ich spreche Deutsch.

5:44 PM  
Anonymous josh (figure out MY lastname) said...

lol... holy shit, i clicked on josh's name and judging from the number of ads for computer software, i'm gunna assume josh either works with or is very invested in computers...is that an outside in the fresh air job josh?

LMAO

5:53 PM  
Anonymous a very experienced internet "researcher" said...

hey Josh, you set the task of others to attempt to determine your last name. Did you really have to make it that easy? Honestly. I'm not a prick that's going to go writing it on the walls of a thread, but seriously people, if you care, take a gander at his site and you too will be able to come to conclusions that Josh himself may have overlooked before posting his "no last name" comments.

9:51 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

i must say that was pretty easy.....

12:18 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Sidebar...I am pretty sure there are alot of Jewish people who speak German, Josh...So, you CAN speak to a Jew in German!

10:29 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

josh likes it being thrust in his face.

2:58 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

To the angry feminist 7:27:

The other day, I saw a boy wearing Uggs. IT'S SPREADING. Therefore, violence against Ugg-wearers does not necessarily mean violence against women.

And it really was pretty funny. However, Josh (who is thankfully not my boyfriend Josh) is not funny.

- Fellow feminist (and procrastinating on studying)

10:35 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Ha ha ha, Feminist @ 10:35 pm feels the need to brag about havig a boyfried on an online post...PRICELESS!

4:42 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

We can fry boys online?

11:26 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

YES! haven't you tried it? gotta love the smell of burning flesh coming from your computer monitor.

3:36 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

i smell burnt toast again...

9:49 PM  

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