"But I did spill malt liquor all over myself. Are you an alcoholic?"

Random Amorous Girl: Are any of you wearing [some specific cologne]?
Guy #1: Yeah.
Random Amorous Girl: Oh my god. I could smell it a mile away. I love it. Whenever I smell it at work it's like near orgasmic and I need go take my break!
Guy #1 to Guy #2 and Guy #3: I'm not wearing any cologne tonight.

-- Kegger, overheard by Blake