And don't let him anywhere near a three-hole punch!

Guy: Uh-oh... the stapler is gone from the circulation desk. I really need to staple this!
Girl: Don't worry, I have a little stapler in my pencil case. You can use it if you want.
Guy: (happily stapling away) Wow, it's a good thing I don't have one of these! I'd be so distracted!
Girl: By a stapler? What would you be stapling that you don't staple already?

-- Law Library